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Her fingers clutched the bouquet tightly, her nails digging into the pretty red ribbon. Alex hadn't been able to get a word in edgewise, a first for her.Īlex allowed her now light-green eyes to roam over her figure in the mirror before forcibly turning her head back towards the church doors. Her handmaidens (or that's what they referred to themselves as) had gone all out, gushing and chattering away as they did so. It seemed pretty out of place, hanging in the entrance hall of a church. It didn't calm her nerves though.įor the hundredth time, Alex turned her head to the large mirror hanging on the wall beside her. It consisted of poinsettias, dark red roses, little bundles of holly berries, and pinecones wrapped together by a thick red ribbon. It was a rather lovely bouquet, if screaming seasonal. Actually, it was the only one currently running through her brain.Īlex fingered the bouquet nervously. Make time to do things that you love and that help you feel good,” Lerner says.The thought ran through Alex's mind. “Don’t feel guilty about enjoying life even during the grieving process. Loss is a part of life, so make room and time to grieve,” Lerner says. “Don’t fully immerse yourself in work or other activities. It can be tempting to just try to forget about your loss and move on with the endless distractions available to us these days (alcohol, projects, dating apps, you name it), but you can’t outrun grief for long.
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Remember that no one ever died from crying.” Make space for the loss “It can also mean expressing them in whatever way feels best for you. “‘Be strong,’ a phrase often heard during the grieving process, doesn’t have to mean keeping your feelings bottled up inside,” Lerner says. While there’s no way to bring the person back, there are ways to mend the broken hearts left behind. Losing a loved one is one of the most excruciating ways to obliterate a heart. “Practice deep breathing, yoga, and meditation,” says Staik. When we’re used to being around someone 24/7, it can be quite a shock to our system when they’re no longer around. Cut out sweets and alcohol as much as possible.” Connect “Lift yourself up emotionally, mentally, and physically,” Staik says.
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While it’s tempting to lie around in sweats for days on end (we’ve been there) and stock your fridge full of ice cream and pizza, taking good care of yourself now will save you from more struggle later. “Think of other past relationships and look for patterns.” Prepare a self-care action plan
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“Recall your emotions and thoughts during the romance - from its early stages to when things began to get rough, to when it ended,” Staik recommends. Take an honest look at what you just went through. In the meantime, psychotherapist Athena Staik shares three important tips to make it feel a little better.
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How to mend a broken heart after a breakupĪs more scientists confirm the biological basis of love, there may eventually be a treatment for heartbreak. Spousal bereavement is associated with more pronounced ex vivo cytokine production and lower heart rate variability: Mechanisms underlying cardiovascular risk? DOI: 10.1016/j.psyneuen.2018.04.010 Tragically, heartbreak came at the expense of their actual hearts. The researchers suspect this was a result of a 53 percent increased risk of cardiovascular disease. DOI: 10.1016/j.hlc.2010.10.073Ī 2018 study found that widows and widowers were 41 percent more likely to die within the first 6 months after losing their spouse. Haemodynamic changes during early bereavement: potential contribution to increased cardiovascular risk. People who are in the early stages of grief are more likely to experience increased blood pressure and heart rate, which can raise their cardiovascular risk. It might even be possible to die of a broken heart. Social rejection shares somatosensory representations with physical pain. A 2011 study found that people had similar brain activity when they viewed a photo of a former love and when they burned their arm. Heartbreak can be such an intense experience that some scientists suggest it feels the same as physical pain. Heartbreak really hurts, scientists agree